The Sunshine Project and Why We Should All Do Our Best to Be the Light

Well folks, here we are. Near the end of what will likely and hopefully be the strangest and most challenging year of our lives.

Above was me sometime in April or May and below is me now. New house, new puppies, new state who dis?

I find myself in a totally new world, almost literally, happier and more grateful than ever, even though I can’t be at the shop due to COVID. I feel ready for the next war armed as an (even) saltier and mightier warrior. Sure I was wounded in the field, but I’ve mostly recovered and I learned a ton. Somehow though, I still feel terror know what’s to come as the short and cold days of winter approach.

How is that possible? To feel such opposite things at the same time, in the same body? I struggle every day with letting joy and sorrow, fear and bravery sit side by side at my table.

As many of you know, those few months of quarantine were pretty difficult for me….for the kids, for Andrew, for our marriage- it was ROUGH. We were blessed in many ways (being able to work from home and having Andrew’s job to cover my sudden lack of income), but living in a NYC apartment, in the throes of COVID, in a pandemic hot spot, with two little kids, with two small businesses on hold- put our marriage and my ability to be an optimist to the test. Then throw in the BLM movement, the riots, protests, bizarre curfews, and political landscape in general and it quite literally felt like we were living in one, big, hot pressure cooker. I felt myself scrounging for scraps of hope. Especially after finding out the building’s beloved doorman of 45 years (about to retire) was taken by COVID.

That scrap of hope finally came in the form of me baking little “Sunny” cookies and delivering with notes and promises of help to neighbors in our building.

The note was basically me trying to reach another human being during a time when getting in an elevator was so terrifying we once didn’t leave the apartment for 10 days; When walking down 76th street meant you’d pass the Lenox Hill refrigerated trucks full of body bags; when elderly people were starving to death inside their apartments, and when you’d curse the news every time the president or some other right wing loon would tell the country it was all a hoax and pretty much “like the flu”. Sure- it’s a hoax until it’s your uncle that gets the damn thing working as a painter for the MTA (please explain to me how painting was a job that couldn’t have been put on hold?) and we find ourselves seriously wondering if he’s going to make it. Well, let’s just say that for many of us the drink of the day was hopelessness followed by a shot of helplessness and a bottle of wine and that human contact of any form was terrifying.

But I digress, the note simply stated that I was really sad and scared, but refused to drown in the darkness. I mentioned that we could be the light for each other and offered grocery shopping help and cookies in exchange for them simply telling me they wanted some, thus giving me purpose and a chance to feel the joy of spreading joy (my favorite brand of happiness).

A short while later I rebranded TKT including a happy little sun into our logo (my nickname was Sunny growing up) and changed our slogan to “Baking the World a Better Place”. Once TKT reopened in June, we were intent on sending out ripples of kindness. We dropped cookies of at the Ronald McDonald house and donated portions of our proceeds to 3 charities. I focused on being the light for others, when I couldn’t see the light for myself. If that feeling was then projected by them, we would eventually all light the world for eachother, and ourselves. I know it sounds super hippie dippie, but does that make sense?

See, it’s a powerful thing to know you are needed. I think if we all knew how much we needed each other- and therefore how much we are needed- our lives would be so much more meaningful. We would finally understand that each one of us has the power to change our own lives and the lives of others based on how we choose to live our lives. Even in the smallest of ways, a ripple can become a wave, a tiny bit of a snow, an enormous crushing ball of force.

I believe it because I’ve seen it. As a student of the universe, the oldest of the old schools, I have learned that we are all inextricably linked and that kindness is the most powerful force of all the forces. Part of its power is that it’s completely free. Anyone can afford it. We can all give it freely. It doesn’t run out.

Now I’m not saying we all become Mother Theresa and devote our lives to only helping others- I get how ridiculous that sounds and when so many of us feel as if we are about to burst at the sheer load of life right now. Plus, I curse like a sailor so I’m not sure I’ll ever be canonized- but I’d like to take today to challenge you to use kindness as your weapon against the dark for the rest of 2020 and moving forward as well.

This can happen in tiny ways. Learn the name of your local store clerk, and your UPS driver, and anyone else you see on the daily but treat as just a commodity (hard to hear- but we are all guilty of this). It takes very little time and effort and makes a real difference.

Raj for example owns the country store by us on Route 33. He and his family work there and are always so friendly. They have two gas pumps, split firewood, household staples, their business is so helpful as we can go there for many of our needs and it’s just 4 minutes away. By knowing his name and being friendly, I become a positive in his day and his warm reaction brings me joy too.

So many people treat the humans they come into contact with as personal punching bags (this includes the people in and out of your households). Being short or rude and just generally taking out our frustrations on other people may make you feel better in the smallest short-term, but it’s a rabbit hole of awfulness. Kindness on the other hand is quite the opposite. The effect lifts the recipient AND the giver up. Joy begets joy. Now you just have to find ways to spread it. Sprinkle that shit everywhere. Like glitter, but even brighter.

An easy way to start is by downloading this free little note and leaving a pile of drinks and snacks for your delivery people who are surely working harder than ever before and putting their own lives at risk so we can grocery shop online and making Jeff Bezos richer by the minute. It doesn’t cost much. I get a giant box of snacks (healthy and indulgent) and little water bottles from Costco and we are talking maybe $.10- $.15 per item. You could also bake something or just leave a nice note for them thanking them.

The medicine that is kindness is what I prescribe myself when I’m feeling the crappiest. I check in on my loved ones, randomly Facetime someone- whatever. As we head into the unknown and with winter coming of our time (who knew Frozen and GOT would be foreshadowing 2020), I urge you to just reach out and touch someone with kindness and with your mask on and from 6 feet away, because when you can’t see the light- you can still be the light and that, when it all boils down, is #thesunshineproject. Tag someone else in the movement and let’s see if we can make the world a little brighter.

Truly and sincerely yours, with love and hope for a better tomorrow,

Marisol